‘Even just a small difference is a big difference’

Published 9:14 am Thursday, February 10, 2022

There are at least 17 Baldwin County children on a list that grows daily of local students who need mentors.

Big Brothers Big Sisters is a one-on-one mentoring program that pairs children with adults based on compatibility. A recent influx of student referrals to the program has the agency in need of more adult volunteers.

Shannon Ryan, Mentoring Relationship Specialist for Big Brothers Big Sisters in Baldwin County, said she currently has three active matches in the community. There are three “bigs” who are waiting for a match, while 17 “littles” are waiting.

Ryan said she believes that there is a common misconception about time involvement that often keeps adults from committing to the program.

“I’m having a problem getting mentors because people think that there’s a lot of time commitment in mentoring and there’s really not,” Ryan said.

She said most mentors typically spend two to three hours every other week or weekend with their mentee and communicate within the week as well.

Christy Bates is one adult volunteer who recently got involved. Bates, 45, met her little sister, Brianna, just before Christmas. So far, the two have been to Baskin Robins together, have done art together at Brianna’s home and have even attended a Mercer women’s basketball game. The two also text and talk during the week.

Brianna, 8, said her favorite thing about her big sister so far is “that she is funny,” but there’s another aspect about her that will undoubtedly make a difference in her life.

“She encourages me not to give up,” she said.

Brianna’s mother, Crystal, has already seen firsthand the care that Bates puts into her relationship with the 8-year-old.

“Even though she has a life of her own, she still includes Brianna as if she was her own child spending that time with her and checking in on her.”

Bates said she hopes their relationship allows Brianna to come out of her shell more in public.

“She has the most exuberant personality, so I would like for her to be able to show that to everyone, how great she is.”

As often is the case, the reward isn’t only for the “little,” but for the “big” as well.

“I think Brianna is a great person,” Bates said. “She’s interesting to me, and I like hanging out with little kids. They’re just different from hanging out with adults because they see things in a different way, and it helps you remember that the whole world is not based around all of the things going on in the world … She has her own viewpoint of things, and I like listening to her.”

Ryan said for mentors of the program, having the sense that they have made an impact on someone else’s life is the rewarding part, in addition to what these mentors learn from the children.

“Even just a small difference is a big difference … We learn so much from somebody else that we might not have learned from our own history and our own background. So, they can take that experience that they’re gaining from their little and put it toward how they perceive the world from there on.”

Ryan said the program encourages mentors to attend activities their “littles” are involved in so that they have support out in the community, as well.

While all volunteers are needed, Ryan said there has been an increase in African American students who are needing mentors.

“Every organization in mentoring needs Black applicants for volunteers, not just for males but for females, too. Oftentimes, we find that kids will open up more if they can relate to their mentor. In fact, at Big Brothers Big Sisters, we take our applicants with our littles and our bigs and we match them based on personality, interests and their characteristics.”

Through her work, she has seen time and again the impact these relationships have on the kids involved in the program.

“For the little, it’s for somebody to be there that is consistent, that’s dependable, that loves them, that is their support system.”

There is an application process for becoming a mentor, but at the end of the day, the most important qualification is the capacity to love a child.

“We really would love to have some kids taken care of and loved,” Ryan said. “These kids, their biggest wish is that they just wish they had somebody that would listen to them and love them… They just want somebody to love them. That’s all we ask for.”

For more information on becoming a mentor, email Ryan at shannon.ryan@bbbsga.org.